I’ve often observed that many people’s top-ranking fear is not death but having to speak in public. The joke is that these people would rather lie in a casket at their own funeral than give the eulogy.
Public speaking for people who suffer from panic attacks or general anxiety often becomes a major source of worry, possibly weeks or even months before the speaking event is to occur.
These speaking engagements don’t necessarily have to be the traditional
“on a podium” events; they can be as simple as an office meeting where the
individual is expected to express an opinion or give verbal feedback.
In this case, the fear centers on having a panic attack while speaking.
The individuals fear being incapacitated by the anxiety and hence unable to
complete what they’re saying. They imagine fleeing the spotlight and having to
make all kinds of excuses later for their undignified departure -out the office
window . . .
This differs slightly from the majority of people who fear public speaking.
With others, their fear tends to revolve around going blank while speaking or
feeling uncomfortable under the spotlight of their peers. The jitters or nerves
are, of course, a problem for this group as well-but they’re unfamiliar with
that debilitating threat, the panic attack, because they most likely haven’t
experienced one before.
So how should a person with an anxiety issue tackle public speaking?
Stage 1 is accepting that all of these bizarre and, quite frankly,
unnerving sensations aren’t going to go away overnight. In fact, you’re not
even going to concern yourself with getting rid of them for your next talk.
When they arrive during a speech or meeting, you’re going to approach them in a
new manner.
We need to build your confidence back to where it used to be before any
of these sensations ever occurred. This time, you’ll approach it in a unique,
empowering manner, allowing you to feel your confidence again. Some say that
most of the top speakers are riddled with anxiety before an event, but they
somehow use this nervousness to enhance their speech.
I’m going to show you exactly how to do
this.
My first point is this, and it’s
important:
The average healthy person can experience an extreme array of anxiety
and very uncomfortable sensations while giving a speech and is in no danger of
ever losing control, or even appearing slightly anxious to the audience. No
matter how tough it gets, you’ll always finish your piece-even if, at the
outset, it feels very uncomfortable to go on.
You won’t become incapacitated in any way.
The real breakthrough happens when you fully believe that you’re not in
danger and that the sensations will pass. By asking for more, you’re saying:
“I realize that you [the anxiety] hold no threat over me.”
What keeps a panic attack coming again and again is the fear of the
fear-the fear that the next one will really knock your socks off and the
feeling that you were lucky to have made it past the last one unscathed.
Because they were so unnerving and scary, it’s your confidence that’s
been damaged by previous anxiety episodes. Once you fully understand that
you’re not under any threat, then you can have a new response to the anxiety as
it arises while speaking.
There’s always a turning point when a person moves from general anxiety into
a panic attack, and that happens with public speaking when you think to
yourself:
I won’t be able to handle this in front of these people.
That split second of self-doubt leads to a rush of adrenaline, and the
extreme anxiety arrives in a wavelike format. If, however, you feel the initial
anxiety and react with confidence that this isn’t a threat to you, you’ll
process the anxiety rapidly.
Using this new approach is a powerful ally because it means it’s okay to
feel scared and anxious when speaking. That’s fine-you’ll feel it, and you’ll
move with and through the sensations in your body and out the other side.
Because people are often very anxious before the talk has begun, they
may feel they’ve already let themselves down. Now you can relax on that point.
It’s perfectly natural to feel the anxiety.
Take, for example, the worst of the sensations you’ve ever experienced
in this situation-be it general unease or loss of breath. You’ll have an
initial automatic reaction that says:
“Danger-I’m going to have an episode of anxiety here, and I really can’t
afford for that to happen.”
At this point, most people react to that idea and confirm that it must
be true because of all the unusual feelings they’re experiencing. This is where
your train of thought creates a cycle of anxiety that produces a negative
impact on your overall presenting skills.
So let that initial “Oh dear, not now” thought pass by, and immediately
follow it up with the attitude of:
“There you are-I’ve been wondering when you would arrive. I’ve been
expecting you to show up. By the way, I’m not in the least threatened by any of
the strange sensations you’re creating. I’m completely safe here.”
Instead of pushing the emotional energy and excitement down into your
stomach, you’re moving through it.
Your body is in a slightly excited state, exactly as it should be while
giving a speech-so release that energy in your self-expression. Push it out
through your presentation, not down into your stomach.
Push it out by expressing yourself more forcefully. In this way, you
turn the anxiety to your advantage by using it to deliver a speech; you’ll come
across as more alive, energetic, and in the present moment.
When you notice the anxiety drop, as it does when you willingly move
into it, fire off a quick thought when you get a momentary break (as I’m sure
you have between pieces), and ask it for “more.” You want more of its intense
feelings because you’re interested in them and absolutely not threatened by
them.
It seems like a lot of things to be thinking about while talking to a
group of people, but it really isn’t. You’d be amazed at how many different,
unrelated thoughts you can have while speaking. This approach is about adopting
a new attitude of confidence about what you might have deemed a serious threat
up until now.
If your predominant fear of speaking is driven by a feeling of being
trapped, then I suggest factoring in some mental releases that can be prepared
before the event. For example, some events allow you to turn the attention back
to the room to get feedback, etc., from the audience. If possible, prepare such
opportunities in your own mind before the engagements.
This isn’t to say that you have to use them, but people in this
situation often remark that just having small opportunities where attention can
be diverted for the briefest moment makes the task seem less daunting.
It may even be something as simple as having people introduce themselves
or opening the floor to questions. I realize these diversions aren’t always
possible and depend on the situation, but anything you can factor in that makes
you feel less trapped or under the spotlight is worth the effort.
All material provided in these emails are for informational or educational
purposes only. No content is intended to be a substitute for professional
medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Consult your physician regarding the
applicability of any opinions or recommendations with respect to your symptoms
or medical condition
0 comments:
Post a Comment